How to Delay Ejaculation

by Lovehoney

on Oct 23, 2018

delay ejaculation

You're having great sex, everything's going well. You can feel the tension building. Then, suddenly...

It's all over.

We know it can be frustrating when the fun finishes before it's really begun, but it's a lot more common than you think.

Thankfully there are a few tips and tricks to employ that could help the fun last as long as you both want.

Sexstellungen während der Schwangerschaft

1. Have a little patience

Yes, we know it can be frustrating when your partner finishes before you've had a chance to get into the swing of things, but try not to let any disappointment get the better of you.

Be tactful, be kind, and don't blame them. Especially if it's the first time you've been intimate together, or your partner hasn't had sex for a while.

And remember, an orgasm doesn't have to mean the end of your sexytime.


2. Slow it down

Thrusting away or stroking, licking or rubbing like it's a race may feel great in the moment, but the chances are you'll climax much faster that way.

When you feel yourself about to climax, decreasing the intensity of whatever your partner is doing (think slow, shallow strokes rather than deep thrusts and long, lingering licks with the flat of their tongue) or taking a total break from it, can stop things escalating too quickly without losing all that sexual excitement.

Try turning all your attention to your partner, using something small and stimulating like a finger vibe.

sexual positions

3. Positions

Lots of people have their preferred positions. One, for example, they know will get them over the finish line in record time. If that's the last thing you want, try a position that can help prevent overstimulation.

Lying down doggie (a variation of doggy style) for example, is a great option for heterosexual couples as, even though it's super sexy, it only allows for fairly shallow penetration, limiting the range and speed of movement.

Start in the traditional position before you both lower down slowly onto whichever surface you've chosen. The receiving partner should be lying flat, with the giving partner lying on top - or raised up slightly on their knees.

This angle requires a slow and shallow grind which limits the in-out penetration, limiting any overly-intense stimulation.

Explore new positions with this pack of 52 cards and find which work best for you.

cock ring

4. Products

Cock rings are an incredibly simple sex aid yet they can have amazing results for certain people.

They consist of a small stretchy ring that sits at the base of the erection and work by restricting blood flow out of the penis, which in turn can help to make erections feel harder and last longer.

Many cock rings come with enhancements to pleasure your partner and delight their sweet spots, which may speed them up and help level the playing field.

EDGE Stroker cup

5. Edging

If you have time and the capacity, masturbating a few hours before sex can help to decrease your sensitivity. Though, understandably, this isn't always feasible, especially if you're on a date.

A popular method that requires a bit of practice is that of 'edging'. This is where you condition the body's responses during masturbation by stopping just before the moment of climax, waiting 30 seconds before continuing.

You repeat this method until you build up a better pleasure tolerance level.

There are many toys you can use to help with this practice, and a stroker like the Tracey Cox EDGE cup is perfect for enjoyable edging practise.

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Written by Lovehoney. For collaborative posts between Lovehoney team members and guest authors
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Originally published on Oct 23, 2018. Updated on Aug 5, 2020