What is a Dildo?

Understand how a dildo can enhance your solo or couples’ play.

When you want straightforward satisfaction, you should reach for a dildo. The perfect addition to solo play and couple’s play, dildos are very versatile sex toys. In this guide, we’ll go through what they are, why you’d use one, and the different types of dildo.

What is a dildo?

A dildo is a phallic-shaped sex toy that is designed to stimulate your internal erogenous zones, including the G-spot and the P-spot. Dildos can be used vaginally, anally, and - if they vibrate - externally, too, depending on which type of dildo you buy.

What does a dildo look like?

Dildos come in many different sizes, shapes, and colors, but they’re often modelled on the shape and size of an erect penis. They usually have a bulbous head and some even have lifelike balls or protruding veins along the shaft, which can enhance pleasure.

Whether you’re inviting your lover into the fun, or saving it all for yourself, there are so many benefits to using a dildo in the bedroom:

  • They are incredibly versatile, and there’s bound to be one that’s perfect for you.
  • They can be an awesome prelude to sex, helping to get you aroused and warm up your muscles before penetration.
  • Having sex with a dildo can be incredibly pleasurable, especially if you prefer internal stimulation.
  • Many are blessed with a suction-cup base, ideal for hands-free fun, and used in a strap-on harness.
  • Dildos with a flared base can be used both vaginally and anally.

Beginner tips on using a dildo for the first time

So you’ve bought your first dildo from Lovehoney and now what? For some people, it can feel a bit daunting to use a dildo for the first time but not to worry, we’re here to talk you through it.

Start Small

Using a dildo can take some getting used to, especially if you haven’t dabbled much in penetration. This is why we suggest beginning with something on the smaller side to make insertion a little easier. Dildos can range in sizes as little as 4 inches and as large as 18 inches. This is why it’s important to pay attention to the measurements on the product page before you buy your new dildo. If you’re still not sure what you’ll be working with, use your trusty ruler to get a visualisation.

Try something soft and slim like the Lovehoney Curved Silicone Suction Cup Dildo 5.5 Inch and work your way up. You’ll be wanting to add to your collection in no time.

Use Lube with your Dildo

Lube is your best friend when it comes to using a dildo (or any sex toy for that matter). A generous helping of lubricant will make your playtime feel even more amazing and give your dildo the slippery ease it needs to glide around your erogenous zones.

If your dildo is made out of glass or metal, feel free to use whichever lubricant you’d like including the silicone, water-based or oil-based kinds. If your dildo is made out of silicone however, make sure you are using a water-based lube only. For more information, read our beginner’s guide to lube.

Step-by-Step Guide on How to Properly Use a Dildo

How to insert a dildo

1. Lube up

We said it before but seriously, use lube. Start by covering the tip of the dildo with your fave lubricant, using your hand to spread it down the shaft and don’t be shy, you can never have too much.

2. Take your time

Start slowly and spend some time getting used to the dildo around your genitals.

If you are planning on using it in your vagina, try some external stimulation before penetration by rubbing the dildo along your labia and gently against your clitoris. This will “warm you up”, so to speak, for using a dildo inside you for G-spot stimulation.

The same goes for anal play. Slow stimulation around the anus, butt cheeks and perineum will help to prepare the anus for penetration and pleasure. Make sure your dildo has a tapered end, you’ve used the bathroom beforehand and avoid using your sex toy on any other area once it has been inserted into the anus.

3. See what pleasure you can find

Once you’re ready, spread your labia or butt cheeks using your spare hand (or ask your partner if they’re around) and slowly insert your dildo into your vagina or anus. If you only want to insert a couple of inches at a time then go ahead, this is your playtime so do what feels right for you. For explosive results, use a thrusting motion at an angle which stimulates the G-spot on the front wall of the vagina or alternatively, the P-spot on the front wall of the anus of someone with a prostate.

How to masturbate with a dildo

Whether you’re riding solo or partaking in some mutual masturbation with your partner in crime, your sesh can be made even hotter with a dildo. The best part about masturbation is that you are in complete control of your pleasure so you can explore different techniques and positions as much as you like.

Try thrusting the dildo inside you slowly and then building up speed or experiment with how deep you go each time to see what you’re in the mood for. If you’re up for multitasking, one hand can be in charge of penetrating with the dildo and the free one can be stimulating your other erogenous zones. Throw in a vibrator to the mix and you’ll be laughing.

Don’t just stick to the same positions either. Move around and find angles which can lead to a deep penetration or different kind of stimulation. The world is your oyster when it comes to a dildo.

How to Ride a Dildo

Riding a dildo on your own is not only excellent for getting your kicks, but a great way to practise the real deal as well. Trying different positions will help you learn what you like and what angles bring you the most pleasure so you can then show your partner when it comes time for penetrative sex with them.

There are a number of ways you can ride a dildo. One of the most popular is while it’s fitted into a strap-on harness and used with a partner.

Other Great Ways and Positions to Use a Dildo

Using a Dildo in the Bathroom

If you have a suction cup dildo, you can attach it to your shower wall and use it standing up or alternatively, try it attached to the floor of your bathtub and lower yourself onto it to ride.

Temperature Play

Some of the most popular dildos are made from metal and glass. The best part about them? They can easily be warmed up or cooled down so you can experiment with temperature play.

To cool your toy down, place it in a bowl with iced water or on a clean plate in the freezer and wait until it’s as cold as you like, add a silky silicone lube and run your smooth dildo over your nipples, stomach and other erogenous zones.

To heat it up, you can place your toy in a bowl or pot of hot water. When you’re ready to use, make sure it is not too hot for the sensitive areas you may be planning on stimulating.

How to Choose the Right Dildo to Use

Choosing the right dildo is all about thinking first about what you want your toy to do. Do you want to focus on G-spot stimulation? P-spot stimulation? Would you like to add some clitoral stimulation to the mix as well? Ask yourself those questions then get busy exploring on Lovehoney.

What is the best dildo?

When you’re starting out with dildos, all you want to be able to do is type ‘nice dildo’ into Google and be presented with a single result that is the perfect one for you.

Sadly, the world of sex toys doesn’t work quite like that - but we’ll run through all the different kinds of dildo to help you pick the best one for you.

Types of Dildos (and how to use them)

Anal dildo

Anal dildos actually live in the Anal Sex Toys section. They're specifically designed for anal use and there are some important differences between them and a standard dildo.

Anal dildos are often slimmer in girth and are designed to stimulate all those wonderful nerve-endings - especially when it comes to targeting a man's prostate gland. Often, anal dildos will have a flared base for added safety.

Start with: BASICS Anal Prober 7 Inch

Dildo harnesses and kits

If you’re planning on enjoying pegging or strap-on sex with your partner, then this is where to look! You’ll find a selection of harnesses, some with compatible dildos supplied with them.

Beginners will appreciate the kits as they're easy to use and come ready to wear. If you’ve enjoyed strap-on sex before but are looking to update your harness collection, take a look here for a variety of hard-wearing and durable harnesses that will easily fit compatible dildos that you already own.

Start with: Lovehoney Beginner's Strap-On Harness Kit with 5 Inch Pegging Dildo

Double-ended dildos

A dildo - with two ends! Although these sex toys look intimidating, they’re great for sharing and extremely pleasurable. Double-ended dildos come in a range of sizes and shapes, allowing you to bend them and twist them to enjoy different positions or experience the fun of double penetration.

Double enders can easily be enjoyed by two people or just one person who loves a little extra length from their sex toys.

Start with:BASICS Mini Double Penetration Dildo

Glass dildos

Made of solid borosilicate glass, these dildos aren’t as delicate as they look. In fact, glass dildos are very durable and can be used hot or cold, without the fear of them cracking, smashing, or chipping.

The firm material is wonderful for G-spot or prostate stimulation and the smooth glass makes insertion easy and comfortable. Glass dildos are also easy to keep hygienically clean, so they're brilliant for anal use too.

Start with: Tracey Cox Supersex Glass Dildo Set

Inflatable dildos

Yep, you heard that right - these dildos inflate! Made of flexible latex or rubber, these dildos can be pumped up with air using the attached pump, to create a dildo which is huge in both length and girth.

Why would anyone want an inflatable dildo? Because it creates a full-up feeling that stretches you to satisfaction, that's why! For beginners, we recommend starting small, so you can experiment slowly but surely until you get to the size you desire.

Start with: Cock Locker Inflatable Dildo 6 Inch

Large dildos

Pretty self-explanatory, the large dildos section contains dildos measuring 7 inches or more in length. It also includes extra girthy dildos, so whether you like it big, long, or both, you can find something to suit you.

However, please read the descriptions - some of the large dildos are so MASSIVE that they’re only for the very, very experienced. The Doc Johnson Bam Realistic Large Cock is one of these.

Start with: Doc Johnson Bam Black Realistic Large Cock

Metal dildos

The phrase ‘don’t knock it, until you’ve tried it’ rings very true when it comes to metal dildos. Heavy and rigid, they don’t sound very appealing, but the high-shine finish is easy on the eye and the cool sensation they create feels great when used internally. Metal dildos are also super smooth, allowing for easy penetration, which is great for beginners who might be scared of the sensations.

Leading brand njoy are the masters of metal toys and each product in the range has superb reviews.

Start with: njoy Pure Wand Stainless Steel Dildo

Realistic dildos

Realistic dildos are incredibly popular because they look like the real thing and, more importantly, they feel like the real thing too. Available in all different sizes and shapes (just like real penises), realistic dildos are good for beginners as they’re easy to handle, easy to use, and are shaped to fit perfectly.

The Lovehoney Lifelike Lover Realistic Dildo 6 Inch is ideal as a starter dildo and its bigger brother, the Lifelike Lover Classic Realistic Dildo 8 Inch, is a great step-up for those who want a little extra.

Start with: Lifelike Lover Classic Realistic Dildo 6 Inch

If you've been looking for a realistic dildo vibrator but haven't found it yet, it's perhaps because they actually live in the vibrators section. A realistic dildo vibrator gives you the lifelike feel of a penis, but with the addition of delicious vibrations.

Lots of realistic dildo vibrators may be realistic-feeling but bright purple and glittery, while others are molded from real people’s penises and look even more lifelike.

Start with: Lovehoney Lifelike Lover Vibrating Realistic Dildo 8 Inch

Silicone dildos

Skin-safe, hygienic, boilable, bleachable, hypoallergenic, odorless, tasteless, non-toxic - need we go on? Silicone dildos offer a body-friendly alternative to rubber, which can cause allergic reactions in those who are sensitive to latex.

Smooth and firm, the silicone dildos section is the ideal place to explore if you’re looking to splash your cash on something beautiful and long-lasting.

Start with: Lovehoney Lifelike 5.5 Inch Pink Dildo

Suction Cup Dildos

One of the most versatile sex toys out there, suction cup dildos stick to almost any smooth, flat surface for playtime in a number of places, many positions and as part of solo or shared pleasure.

Stick your suction cup dildo to your shower wall, toilet seat or mirror, simulate a threesome with your partner (minus the extra person in the room) or strap it on. The list really is endless.

Start with: BASICS Glow In the Dark Realistic Suction Cup Dildo 6 Inch

Thrusting Dildos

Not only do we have types of dildos which vibrate, a few of them even provide a thrusting motion. These special dildos are amazing for penetration in the vagina and the butt and create a realistic sex sensation like nothing else.

You could try adding a thrusting dildo to a harness which will work wonders on pegging and strap-on sex as well. They also give you or your partner a rest as it removes all the wrist work which other dildos require.

Start with: Lifelike Lover Classic Realistic Rotating Dildo Vibrator 8 Inch

Best Dildo for Beginners and First Timers

As we mentioned before, it’s always best to start small when it comes to choosing a dildo so you can get a feel for what it’s like. The Lovehoney Slimline Silicone Suction Cup Dildo 5 Inch is an awesome dildo for beginners as it is soft, slim, not too long and has a versatile suction cup on the bottom.

Recommended Beginner's Dildos

More Sexual Happiness Advice

You can never know enough about sex, right? Join us on our sexploration journey via the thriving Lovehoney forum, our weekly Sexual Happiness podcast and our blog.
Forum-Advice-card

Lovehoney Forum
Podast-Advice-card

Sexual Happiness Podcast
Blog-Advice-card

Lovehoney blog