What Types of Kinks Are There?

In this guide: What’s a kink? | Types of kinks | Kinky prep tips | A-Z of kinks

A bare foot. A jolt of electricity. A doctor’s office. A good, hard spank on the bottom. What do all these have in common? They’re all potential turn-ons for people with certain kinks.

Asking what types of kinks there are is like asking how many flavors of ice cream you can get. The possibilities are practically endless! There are billions of people in the world, which means there are billions of possible ways to have kinky sex – and that’s kind of beautiful.

Here, you’ll get a taste of those sexy possibilities with a quick guide to kink, including a breakdown of some key types of kink and a huge A-Z of kink examples to give you inspiration. You’ll also hear from Javay Frye-Nekrasova, an accredited sex educator, on how to explore kink safely.

Only got time for a quickie?

If you’re new to this (or just pressed for time), here are some fast facts on all things kinky:

• There are dozens and dozens of kinks out there. The list of kinks below is just a small slice of a big, sexy world.

• You may realize you’re not actually a kinky person. That means you’re “vanilla”, and that’s perfectly fine! Vanilla sex can still be hot, passionate, and satisfying.

• Good kink play depends on communication. Before trying any type of kinky play, talk to your partner about what you want to explore and any boundaries you want to set.

• Always agree on a safeword or phrase. A safeword (aka a term other than “no” or “stop”) that signals to all partners to stop the scenario at once, is a crucial part of safe kinky play.

• You can explore kinks with a partner or by yourself, with the help of movies, books, fantasies, porn, and events or workshops.

A kink is something that turns you on which isn’t seen as a “traditional” part of sex. You might enjoy the thought of it, but it’s not an essential part of your sex life. Meanwhile, if you can't get aroused without this thing, it’s a fetish rather than a kink (though the terms are often used interchangeably).

Where do these unconventional sexual interests come from? It depends! “Generalizing that specific kinks come from trauma is overly detrimental to the perception, understanding, and reception of kink,” says sex educator Javay Frye-Nekrasova, whose PhD research has focused on kink and BDSM. “It perpetuates harmful stereotypes about the people that engage in kink and BDSM.”

It’s true that some people might find a link between their kinks or fetishes and traumatic events they’ve experienced. But it’s certainly not the case for everyone. Having a kink is a perfectly normal expression of your sexuality. It doesn’t need to “come from” anywhere so long as you and your sexual partners enjoy yourselves!

Does everyone have a kink?

While yes, there are all sorts of people with kinks, there are also plenty of folks out there without any at all, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Not sure where you fit in? “You can start by completing Yes/No/Maybe List to better figure out what you would be open to,” Frye-Nekrasova says. “If you’re not sure of the names of kinky activities, the BDSM test is a great resource. If you’re more of a visual learner, turning to kink and BDSM porn always works well for seeing activities you might be interested in trying.”

There are so many types of kinks out there that listing them all would be nearly impossible. However, even the most obscure kink most likely taps into one of the following sexy categories:

• Sensation play: Anything kinky that has to do with the five senses. Think: Hot wax, blindfolds, ball gags, and ice cubes. Exploring senses like touch and taste – or limiting certain senses like sight – can be erotic and thrilling.

• Roleplay: Indulging in the fantasy of being someone else – whether it’s watching “pizza guy” porn or pretending you’re meeting a stranger in a bar when it’s really your fiancé. Roleplay lets you step outside yourself in an empowering, freeing way.

• Power Exchange: Classic domination and submission. This could mean physical acts like bondage and restraint play, or psychological roleplay such as consensual non-consent (CNC) or cuckolding. In any case, it involves allowing a partner to either give up or take control.

• Taboo: It’s not for us (or anyone else) to call your kink taboo, as it’s totally subjective anyway. But it’s helpful to acknowledge that the “unacceptable” nature of certain kinks may be part of the appeal for some kinksters. This could include anything from golden showers to incest fantasies or DDLG (daddy dom little girl).

Of course, some kinks fit into multiple categories. For example, spanking is a form of sensation play but it also lends itself very well to roleplay and BDSM power exchange. Labels can be helpful for exploring your fantasies, but don’t worry about figuring out exactly what to call your kink. It’s much more important to learn how to play safely.

Sex should always be consensual, but many kinks require an extra layer of communication. “Learning the safety principles used in the kink community is paramount, especially if you plan to play with others,” Javay explains.

Javay strongly encourages discussing your boundaries before entering a “scene”, i.e. a sexual or sexually-charged encounter that incorporates BDSM, as well as having a safeword or using the stoplight system.

A safeword is a term that signals to everyone that the sex or scene should stop immediately. You might choose a distinctly non-sexual term that would never come up in your chosen fantasy (like “pineapple” or “zebra”). Or you might prefer the stoplight system, where you say “yellow” to show you want to slow down or “red” to request a complete stop.

Communication should continue after you play, too. People in the kink community call this “aftercare”, and it simply means checking in with each other after a kinky experience. You might like to cuddle, have a snack, or even rehydrate together to feel grounded and safe. You can also use this time to talk about what you liked (or didn’t) about a scene.

To give you an idea of how varied kinks can be, we’ve picked one for every letter of the alphabet. If any of these kinks catch your eye, don’t ignore that feeling – use it as a chance to explore your fantasies and find out how you might get more satisfaction out of your sex life.

Of course, you don’t have to try everything that piques your interest. Sometimes simply fantasizing or watching porn is enough!

“For many people, the fantasy is fulfilling in itself, and the idea of doing the activity IRL kills the fantasy,” notes Javay. “Just because you like thinking about something doesn't inherently mean you would want to do it.” Keeping this in mind when you learn about other people’s kinks will also help you stay open-minded and avoid shaming anyone for what turns them on.

A is for Abduction

Growing up, your parents probably told you not to get in a stranger’s van, but someone with an abduction kink might fantasize about doing just that! Exploring this kink through roleplay can be intense, hot, and fun, but since this is technically a form of consensual non-consent (CNC), it’s extra-important to agree on a safeword with your partner.

B is for Bondage

One of the more popular kinks, bondage is the act of restraining or being restrained. This can involve shibari (aka Japanese rope bondage), but you don’t need to learn complicated knots to try the “B” in “BDSM.” Bondage for beginners can be as easy as holding your partner’s hands behind their back or tying their wrist to your bedpost (with consent and a safeword, of course).

C is for Chastity

Chastity kinks involve the withholding of sex. This can look all sorts of ways: Telling your partner they can’t cum without permission (aka orgasm control or orgasm denial), having your partner tease every part of your body but your genitals, or using a chastity device like a cock cage.

D is for Degradation

In daily life, you might not want to find yourself in degrading situations, but this can all change in the bedroom if you have a degradation kink. In fact, there can be something powerful and satisfying about consensually negotiating a scenario where insults and put-downs improve your sex life. And if you’re into cuckolding, that’s technically a form of degradation.

E is for Electrostimulation

It may shock you, but some people get off on, well, being shocked! But please don’t start running around in lightning storms or fingering your nearest wall outlet. People with electrostim kinks need to prioritize safety. One of the best ways to do that, while still letting sparks fly, is with toys specifically designed for electro play – from shocking butt plugs to electrified wands.

F is for Feet

You might know the term “foot fetish,” but unless you can’t cum without a foot in your face, this is technically a kink. It’s also one of the most common kinks – you’ve probably heard jokes about how many bare feet are in Quentin Tarantino’s films. That’s not to say foot kinksters only love the sight of bare feet; they can enjoy sucking toes, kissing high heels, admiring brand-new shoes, or buying dirty socks. If it has to do with feet, it’s fair game.

G is for Gagging

Saying that something makes you gag usually means it disgusts you, but for people with gagging kinks, this retching is quite the turn-on! You can gag your partner with a body part as part of oral sex, but if you want to continually restrict their mouth (a form of power play!), toys are great. There are classic ball gags, O-ring gags that force the wearer’s mouth open, and even a gag with a ball and a five-inch dildo.

H is for Helplessness

Helplessness kinks are all about creating an environment where you or your partner feel powerless. This can look like being tied up with a blindfold, exploring a kidnapping scenario (which is also a form of abduction kink), or roleplaying as someone younger or more naive than you actually are (aka age play). Just don’t forget to discuss your expectations and boundaries beforehand.

I is for Impact Play

Impact play includes spanking, slapping, flogging, whipping, punching, caning, paddling, and everything in between. This form of sadomasochism can be thrilling and cathartic but keep in mind: the way you strike someone matters.

The “meatier” parts of the body, such as butt cheeks and thighs, are usually safer to strike. Avoid the head, chest, lower back, and stomach as these areas hold vital organs. “Take it slow and educate yourself,” says Javay. “Kink and BDSM can carry risks and if you aren't educated those risks are more likely to happen.”

J is for JOI

This one’s for all you rule-followers out there. JOI, or jerk-off instruction, involves one partner (or multiple) dictating how someone (usually with a penis) masturbates. JOI is a popular online porn genre but can also be done in-person or over phone, text, or video chat. JOI can be combined with other kinks, like roleplay, chastity, or degradation.

K is for Klismaphilia

If you’ve ever explored the world of anal sex or rimming, you may have crossed paths with an enema or douche. If not, it’s basically a way of flushing your bowels to make sure they’re fully empty. If this piques your interest, you’re not alone. This kink is called klismpahilia, and it plays well with other kinks like medical play, domination, and degradation.

L is for Latex

You can be turned on by any kind of fabric or material, but latex is one of the most commonly fixated on. When you think about fetishwear, leather and latex likely come to mind. Shiny, tight, and eye-catching, there’s something sensual and ritualistic about latex clothing, especially since putting it on often requires both assistance and lube.

M is for Medical Play

What’s hotter than an apple a day? Medical play – if you have a kink for it, of course. You can get technical with toys like a vaginal speculum (yep, just like at the gynecologist), simulate shots with a lube syringe, or simply pretend like one of you is a doctor with a very, very hands-on approach.

N is for Nipple Play

This one’s self-explanatory: you like getting your nipples played with. What can that look like? Well, almost anything. Go gently with light, teasing touches, engage your senses with licks and gentle (or not so gentle) nibbles, and if you or your partner like pain, there’s a wide variety of nipple clamps to choose from.

O is for Objectum Sexuality

Objectum sexuality may sound fancy, but it’s basically an umbrella term for people who experience sexual arousal from inanimate objects. Have you ever heard a guy talk about how sexy his car is and how beautifully she performs for him? Yeah, it’s kind of like that.

P is for Praise

You’re such a good girl, such a well-behaved boy, such an obedient pet. If any of those phrases sound like dirty talk to you, you may very well have a praise kink. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you’ll be turned on by any compliment, however, and you always want to get consent before engaging in pointedly sexual praise play. Maybe you’ll even be complimented on your safeword choice.

Q is for Quirofilia

Think of quirofilia like the lesser-known cousin of the foot fetish. Yep, we’re talking about hands! Sure, you might like it when your partner runs their hands across your body, puts their hand over your mouth, or plays with your hair, but for a quirophile, this can be more arousing than any other sexual activity.

R is for Roleplay

Roleplay is a very, very broad category of kink. It could mean dressing up in costumes and acting out a pre-scripted or improvised sexual scenario with your partner, but roleplay could also be as simple as calling your dominant partner “daddy.” All roleplay means is playing a role, so as long as everyone is on the same page, anything goes.

S is for Sadism

The “S” in BDSM can mean submission, but it can also mean sadism. It’s important to note that sexual sadists aren’t necessarily mean people, but they do get turned on by consensually causing physical or emotional pain. People into masochism are turned on by feeling pain, so a sadist and masochist can be a match made in kinky heaven.

T is for Tickling

When someone tickles you, you don’t just laugh – your whole body reacts. For someone into tickling, that reaction, as well as the loss of control experienced by the person being tickled, is part of what makes it so hot. You can tickle someone with your fingers or take it up a notch by using a feather tickler.

U is for Underwear

There’s something exciting about wearing a pair of sexy underwear. People with an underwear kink find this more than exciting; they find it straight-up erotic. It’s not just about being the one to wear the pant(ie)s, they could also be fired up from the feeling of silk boxers between their fingers or get sexual pleasure from smelling their partner’s panties while they masturbate.

V is for Vicarphilia

No, this doesn’t mean you’re attracted to vicars. Vicarphilia refers to being excited by excitement itself. This could mean being attracted to a world-traveling thrill seeker, reading or listening to descriptions of other people’s sexual encounters (or writing your own), or getting extra turned on by a type of sex toy you’ve never seen before.

W is for Wax Play

As sensual as playing with hot wax can be, you can’t just light any candle in your house and go to town. There's nothing sexy about an unwanted burn! Fortunately, there are massage candles designed to melt at a lower temperature than a standard candle, so you get that warm temperature play, and the wax melts into a fragrant massage oil.

X is for Xenophilia

You’ve heard of xenophobia but let us introduce you to the sexier version: xenophilia. A xenophile is attracted to all things “foreign.” This could mean finding people of certain nationalities especially attractive, but a xenophile could also fantasize about aliens or creatures from fantastical worlds.

Y is for Yiffing

To understand what yiffing is, you have to familiarize yourself with furries. They’re people who enjoy roleplaying as anthropomorphic animal characters. This could be through online chats, custom art, or in-person meetups where everyone wears a “fursuit.” Not all furries incorporate sex into their lifestyle, but those that do call it “yiffing.”

Z is for Zentai

Japanese anime porn is known as hentai but change one letter and you’re in a completely different kink zone. People with zentai kinks are aroused by full-body suits. Traditionally, zentai suits are monochromatic spandex covering the entire body and face (essentially a morph suit), but for a more traditionally sexy take, try a body stocking.