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6 Handcuff Sex Positions to Thrill Your Partner
on May 7, 2025
Playing with handcuffs can be a hot, exciting, yet simple way to bring BDSM power dynamics to your sex life. And it’s much more common than you think! In fact, bondage is the third most popular type of bedroom accessory (after sex toys and lube) in Washington D.C., as you can see in our US Sex Map.
If you know you and your partner will love the thrill of a little lock-and-key, you’re in luck. Many of your go-to sex positions can be easily switched up with bondage gear. Here are some tips if you're looking to (safely) unlock all the possibilities of sex with handcuffs.
Lock in with your lover: Shop handcuffs and restraints
Bondage tips before you begin
Playing with handcuffs might not seem that kinky to you but, like any BDSM practice, there are some risks. A little communication and preparation will make sure you and your partner(s) have a hot, satisfying, and safe time playing, whether you're just starting to explore handcuff sex positions or are trying several kinky toys at once.
Communicate beforehand
As excited as you may be about your foray into handcuffs or other BDSM restraints, resist the urge to dive in immediately. It’s important to talk with your partner first to establish what you’re both interested in and even more crucially, anything you don’t want to experience while using handcuffs during sex. In addition to discussing dos and don’ts, you should also agree on a safeword, which is a phrase you can say at any time if you want something to stop.
Choose your gear
Yes, you’re considering options and making a purchase, but you’re not at the grocery store – buying sex toys and accessories can be just as hot as foreplay. Use the shopping process to fantasize with your partner! It’ll make the experience more exciting and will also give you a jumping-off point once your new toys have arrived. To ensure reality is as mind-blowing as your fantasy, make sure to get high quality gear from a trusted sex toy retailer. That way, you’ll know every item is body-safe and designed with a ton of user research.
Get your restraint play started
Try a little roleplay
If you’re intimidated or nervous about assuming a kinky role like Dom (Dominant) or sub (submissive), roleplay can help get you out of your head and in the zone. This performance doesn’t typically have an audience, so it can look however you like, but it can help to dress the part. You could be a saucy teacher looking to dole out some discipline, a cocky cowboy who meets their match... The options for sexy roleplay costumes are practically endless.
Check in throughout
Consent doesn’t just happen before sex. It’s important to check in with your partner regularly, especially if you’re trying new positions or incorporating kinky toys like handcuffs or restraints. Does your lover need more lube, and are their hands comfortable in the current position? Cuffs and rope can cut off circulation, so everyone involved should know to stop ASAP if the sub’s limbs change color, feel too cold or warm, or develop a tingling feeling that doesn’t go away even after they move their hands or feet. Checking in will make the experience more pleasurable for everyone.
End with aftercare
Sex involving BDSM can be hot and playful, but it can also be intense! That’s where aftercare comes in. It can look like cuddling, words of affirmation, talking about what just happened, drinking water, eating a snack, watching your favorite show – whatever helps everyone involved comfortably ease out of the power dynamics they were just engaged in.
6 handcuff sex positions to try later
Whether you have multiple pairs of handcuffs already or are still figuring out what type you’d like to try, these positions will put your kinky restraints to great use. Some are classics that work best in a bed while others get a bit more creative.
Dominant Cowgirl
How
A kinky twist on the classic cowgirl position, the Dominant Cowgirl places the penetrating partner in a chair with their arms restrained behind the chair.
The receiver gets on the giver’s lap and faces them with their knees spread and their legs tucked underneath them.
Why
Cowgirl is one of the most common woman on top sex positions, but restraining the partner on bottom adds an additional level of dominance, no matter your gender.
Since the bottom can’t move much or use their hands, the other partner has plenty of opportunities for teasing or showing off (lap dance, anyone?) and once penetration begins, you can get close and lock eyes.
Hot tip
Since this position requires a chair, make sure it's a comfortable one, especially since one partner will be restrained and the other will be on top of them. Practice the position without handcuffs first to get the logistics sorted, and if you’re using a chair that isn’t made from a soft material, perhaps opt for a pair of soft cuffs.
Bondage Queen
How
Inspired by ‘queening’ (the slang term for face-sitting), this position sees the receiving partner handcuffed to the headboard of the bed, laying on their back.
The Dominant partner (who often has a vagina, but that’s up to you) faces in the opposite direction and leans forward on all fours with their lower half positioned over the cuffed partner’s face.
Why
Face-sitting already creates a clear power dynamic, but adding handcuffs is an easy way for bondage beginners to take things to the next level. The receiving partner won’t just be restrained by their lover on their face, they’ll also be unable to use their hands. If you or your partner like feeling totally overpowered, the Bondage Queen is a great choice.
Hot tip
Since it’ll be tough for the receiving partner to speak clearly, you may want to agree on a non-verbal safeword ahead of time that also doesn’t require the use of your hands. And if you don’t have a good headboard for handcuffs, consider an under-mattress spreader restraint.
The Peach
How
The Peach starts with one partner on the ground, face down, butt up a la Doggy Style. Their hands are restrained behind their back, and their partner can now enjoy all there is to offer.
If standard cuffs don’t feel great in this position, you may prefer a wrist-to-waist belt restraint, which distributes your weight on either side of the body instead of binding the wrists together.
Kink is very adaptable, and the best sex positions are the ones everyone feels comfortable in.
Why
The angle of this position is perfect for oral sex, especially rimming. It’s also easy to go from using your mouth on your partner to penetrating them, and the restraints will help emphasize that you can move freely while they must stay sexily in place.
Hot tip
Unlike some other positions, The Peach doesn’t require a bed or chair – just a flat surface. For added spice and even more power play, consider using a spreader bar to keep the receiving partner’s legs open.
Over the Moon
How
Over the Moon is a position that relies on a table and either handcuffs or rope. With rope, the submissive partner lies flat on their back with one limb tied to each leg of the table, with plenty of slack for the arm ties so they’re not stuck in an awkward position.
Alternatively, you can cuff their ankles together or to the table leg, with their wrists cuffed overhead.
Why
Possibilities are endless when you have one partner lying down, spread out, and completely tied down. With easy access to breasts, clitoris, and vulva, it makes a great lesbian sex position, but can be an out-of-this-world experience for anyone. If you’re the Dom, climb on top of your partner and ride away.
Hot tip
Bring in an element of sensory deprivation with a silky blindfold, or add even more stimulation by affixing some nipple clamps to your partner’s exposed chest.
Kinky Pretzel
How
Don’t worry, you don’t need any fancy yoga skills to do the Kinky Pretzel.
The bottom partner lays on their side, almost in the fetal position but with ankle cuffs, while the partner doing the penetrating gets on one knee and takes their lover from behind.
Why
The Kinky Pretzel doesn’t just give your sub the delicious feeling of being folded up and tied down, it also allows for deep penetration.
If your rotation of G-spot sex positions is feeling a bit stale, give this one a try. It’s also a fun way to put a kinky twist on plus size sex positions, since the top has more stability thrusting on one knee than they may have standing or lying down.
Hot tip
A pair of soft, flexible silicone cuffs or bondage tape can be good choices here instead of metal handcuffs, which may dig into your skin.
Shibari Spoon
How
As the name implies, this position works best using Japanese rope bondage, or shibari.
Both partners lay on their side as if they’re spooning, and the receiving partner has their wrists tied together, their forearms tied to their thighs, and their ankles tied to their calves.
Why
Japanese rope bondage isn’t just an intimate experience, it’s also a ritual and an art form. As writer and bondage sex expert Midori says in her book Seductive Art of Japanese Rope Bondage, the bottom “is sensually self-aware that [their] body is being made into a thing of beauty, pleasing both [them] and the top.” The fact that this position resembles spooning makes the intimacy even more intense.
Hot tip
Shibari does require a specific skill set, so if you’re not quite feeling up to learning knots, you could always do a modified version using wrist-to-thigh restraints or even a set of thigh, wrist, and ankle restraints. If you are using rope, be sure to have safety scissors handy just in case.
