The Sexiest Celebrations

We’re all familiar with the concept of a ‘birthday blowjob’, and to a lot of people occasions such as birthdays, Valentine’s Day and New Years' Eve go hand-in-hand with getting lucky. However, which celebration inspires sex the most, and what do you do when you’re met with the expectation of celebratory sex?

We’ve surveyed over 2,000 people over the age of 18 to discover which occasion they have sex on the most, whether ‘celebratory sex’ is seen as more adventurous than everyday sex, and whether or not they feel pressured to have sex around celebratory occasions.

Which celebrations inspire sex the most?

According to our survey, birthdays are the most common celebration that leads to people getting hot and heavy in the bedroom, with 64% of respondents saying they’ve had sex on their own birthday, and 63% on their partner’s birthday. The most romantic day of the year, Valentine’s Day, came in a very close third place, with 61% saying they’ve had Valentine’s sex

Which occasions see the most adventurous sex?

In addition to revealing which celebrations inspire sex the most, we also looked at how people felt about the sex they have during said celebrations. It was found that while birthdays might be the most popular occasion to have sex, many don’t see the most adventurous sex on these occasions.

Valentine’s Day took the number one spot for the celebration that sees the most adventurous sex, with 64% of respondents selecting Valentine’s Day as the celebration that sees the kinkiest sex. This is closely followed by their partner’s birthday (63%) and their own birthday (63%).

As part of our survey, we also asked our participants why they feel that their celebration sex is more adventurous, and trying new positions (53%) came out on top, followed by ‘doing it’ for longer (45%) and ‘doing it’ multiple times throughout the day (39%)

How do people feel about the pressure to ‘perform’ for celebrations?

While celebration sex has become a common part of any sexual relationship, it has become something that’s expected. No person should feel any kind of pressure to have sex, but when we attach sex to an occasion, it seems that people easily fall into the realm of feeling as though they have to perform.

When asked if they have ever felt as though there is more pressure on them to have sex during a celebratory period than on any other day, 36% of respondents admitted that they felt pressure to have sex on their partner’s birthday. Alongside this, 50% of respondents aged 18 to 24 admitted to feeling the pressure to perform on their partner’s birthday.

The psychology behind celebration sex

To further explore the reasoning and pressures behind celebration sex, we asked Dr. Justin Lehmiller, social psychologist and research fellow at the Kinsey Institute, for his thoughts.

Q. What is the reasoning behind why people may feel more inspired to have sex during a celebration?

A. “Social psychologists have long known that strong emotions can sometimes be mistaken for sexual arousal - or can have the effect of amplifying sexual arousal. So if you’re in the midst of an exciting celebration where your body is in a heightened state of generalized physiological arousal (e.g., your heart rate is up), and this is coupled with cues for sexual arousal (e.g., you meet an attractive new person), this ups the odds of being in the mood for sex. On top of this, people often consume alcohol when they’re celebrating, and in small to moderate doses alcohol can act as an aphrodisiac because it lowers sexual inhibitions.”

Q. Why do some people feel pressure to perform sexual acts on different celebrations? (e.g., birthday blowjob)

A. “Celebrations and holidays, such as an anniversary or Valentine’s Day, sometimes lead people to engage in obligatory sex. In other words, they’ll agree to sex they don’t really want because they feel some sense of obligation - it’s something they’re “supposed” to do. This can occur for different reasons. For example, an upcoming celebration might serve as a reminder that they haven’t been intimate with their partner for a while. Alternatively, they might feel pressure to follow a certain social script that sex is “supposed” to occur on days that you celebrate your partner or relationship.”

Q. How can you avoid feeling pressured to have sex on a celebration, and how can you address feeling pressured with your partner?

A. “When you start having sex out of obligation, this can decrease your future sexual desire because, odds are, the sex won’t be great. Obligatory sex can create more issues in your sex life than it solves. If sex is starting to feel obligatory in your relationship, it’s time to have a sexual check-in with your partner. What is and isn’t working for you? How can you get back to having the sex you really want?”

Methodology:

Data is based on a survey we conducted in August 2022 of 2,008 adults.

Expert commentary provided by:

Dr. Justin Lehmiller - social psychologist and research fellow at the Kinsey Institute